Wednesday, September 12, 2012

It starts with wives

Wives, or soon to be wives, there is something that I have been realizing a lot lately. Men have no idea how much influence we play on who they are and how they act. At first this idea was a little overwhelming, the fact that how I relate to my husband pretty much determines his mood and his outlook on life. but then I started thinking it could be really beneficial for our family.

Titus 2:4-5 states that women should be self-controlled, pure, work at home, kind, submissive to husband

when I am positive and encouraging to my husband he is more confident and more positive himself. When I am negative and always complaining I can start to see him become more negative and his motivation starts to diminish. This is why it is so important to be Christlike and to show respect and a positive attitude toward our men. But I must admit I fail often in this area and my family suffers for it.

A caution to this is we have such an influence on our husbands but they don't realize it, it is hard for them to adjust their attitudes if we don't adjust ours. We also influence their decision making. If we push too hard in one direction they may choose that way but it may not be the best for the family. Make sure you are only giving input and HE is making the decision. "It is better for a man to lead poorly then for a women to lead well" - Debi Pearl.

I found myself in this situation a lot, pressuring Thomas to make a decision and in the end it wasn't the best for our family. We need to trust our husbands and pray they choose correctly which is very hard for a controlling personality like me.

I always wonder how many problems in our marriages could be solved by a wife maintaining a positive, loving attitude, obedience to her husband, not controlling situation and having humility, having the ability to be wrong or even to be right but he decides to go the other way. This is a hard and often challenging realization, but I think it will only make our marriages stronger and happier in the end. Besides don't you want a happy and positive husband?